~ I will blow your face clean off your face!~ All men are sculptors, constantly chipping away the unwanted parts of their lives, trying to create their idea of a masterpiece.
~ The other day I got out the shower and I bend down to reach for a towel, and I felt a sharp pain in my chest. Shot through my chest and up around my shoulder and down my spine. I thought 'Oh, Lord.' I thought I was dying. I bent over and looked, and I was standing on my own titty.
~ Anything you have to acquire a taste for was not meant to be eaten.~ When I'm doing stand-up, it's just me depending on me. I know how to go out there and make people laugh. I've been doing it since I was a teenager. I trust my instincts. I just go out and talk. A lot of the time I let the material come from the top of my head.
~ The advice I would give to someone is to not take anyone’s advice.~ I haven't read a newspaper in 20 years. I don't look at the computer or anything. You have to have a filter on what you let in.~ If you're an artist like a really, really long time, it stops being a performance. I'm not performing anymore. I reveal myself to the audience. I show you some of me. It's not a show no more.~ You can't let the good things people say make you feel too good, because you're going to let the bad things make you feel bad.~ How can you do the moonwalk and ask a woman to dance? Hey baby lets dance... cya later!~ I've always had confidence. It came because I have lots of initiative. I wanted to make something of myself.
~ All inspiration comes from a higher power. The body is a shell. The creative spot is from God - You hear voices, everybody does. When you get older, you refer to it as intuition.~ Flowers are the fastest way to a woman's heart. Well, actually, the fastest way is through her rib cage, but flowers are a lot less messy.~ I want a woman who can arouse my intellect as well as my loins.~ I'd like to produce, direct, write, score, and star in a film in exactly the way Chaplin did. I'll do that before I'm thirty.~ I only want to do what I really want to do; otherwise, I'm content to sit here and play my guitar all day.~ I'm in a position that allows me to do what I want to do, and I do it.~ Every bad decision I've made has been based on money.~ I've made 30 movies and for the most part my movies work. In a business where success is an exception and not the rule, I've mostly been successful.~ The economy in Ireland has been rampaging ahead for the last 15 years. Barring an international, political or natural catastrophe, things can only get better for the Irish.